Bloodstream
by Ninazadzia
Summary: If one night is all that they have, then Ben and Rey will make the most of it. M for smut. *Rampant spoilers for TRoS*


**Summary: **If one night is all that they have, then Ben and Rey will make the best of it. M for smut. *Rampant spoilers for TRoS*

**Author's Note: **I don't own Star Wars. Spoilers for TRoS ahead.

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_Bloodstream_

By Ninazadzia

* * *

"_Wake up look me in the eyes again  
I need to feel your hand upon my face  
Words can be like knives  
They can cut you open  
And the silence surrounds you  
And holds you…"_

* * *

It's a pity, really, that this was how it all had to happen.

I could see her so clearly, standing in front of Palpatine. I could feel her anger radiating through the force—her saber was poised to strike him down, and she knew what would happen when she did. A thousand generation of Sith watched over as Rey pulled her weapon up to her face, and as Palpatine's grin widened.

I reached out through the Force, thinking of her last words to me. "I wanted to take your hand. Ben's hand." The tormented expression that flashed across her face as she'd said it, just having given me part of her life force. I knew, then and there, what I had to do—I'd always known deep down how Rey felt about me. But it was another thing to hear it spoken so plainly, straight from her mouth.

I held on to that feeling. The feeling of warmth that coursed inside of me. I channeled all of my energy into it, breaking through the Force, until I saw a flicker of recognition cross her eyes.

She could see my surroundings. She could see _me_. I'd lost my mask and left my cloak behind on my ship. I had no saber, only a blaster I'd stolen off of one of the Stormtroopers, still wearing the black sweater she'd stabbed me through, the one that had once belonged to my father.

She searched my expression, looking at me, breathless. I gave her a small nod. Just as she smiled, I felt the metal hilt of my grandfather's saber press into the palm of my hand.

I fought through the Knights of Ren as if they were paper. I knew she wouldn't be able to hold Palpatine off on her own for very long—strong as she was, we needed each other in this fight. And he knew it, too. I realized it the moment Palpatine reached out to me, asking me to take up the mantel and become the Sith Lord. I'd seen his offer for what it was—a test of loyalty, or rather, stupidity. To see how much I knew. To see how close I was to the truth.

I'd always known who Rey was—Palpatine or not, she was my equal in the Force. We would need each other to rule the galaxy. From the moment our hands touched on Ahch-To, to the moment she rejected my offer aboard Snoke's ship, to the moment she healed me on Kef Bir, to every moment in between—

I knew it would either end in us leading together, or not at all.

* * *

As I crawled out of the pit, the first thing I noticed was the silence. Gone were the jeers and whispers of the Sith lords that had surrounded us. It was replaced by nothing more than the sound of water dripping from the hanging sheets of rock above us. I pulled myself up over the ledge, and I couldn't even make out the sound of Rey's breath.

Rey.

I saw her, lying fifty yards in front of me, motionless on the ground. I crawled out of the hole, gritting my teeth through the pain, desperately clawing my way towards her. I didn't stop until I'd collapsed at her feet. Her white garment was still dripping with from our fight on Kef-Bir, now covered in blood and soot. I gently turned her around, and the sight of her wide, pale blue eyes confirmed what I already knew. She was gone. She'd taken Palpatine down with her, but channeling that much power had overwhelmed her.

I brushed a stray lock of hair away from her face. I'd never forget the moment I first lay eyes on her, in the forest on Takodana. I'd thought that her soft, almost delicate features betrayed her. They masked her raw strength. I knew from the moment I met her that we were destined to be sparring partners, and it seemed almost unfair to have an adversary so pure, so effortlessly beautiful. I was certain she would be my downfall.

I took her hand in mine, cradling her head against my chest. I exhaled, closing my eyes. It had been over a decade since Luke had shown me how to transfer life Force from one being to another, but I kept focusing on the image of her outstretched hand on my side, flowing her life Force through me. That had merely been a wound—life threatening, no less, but nowhere near the caliber of what I was attempting.

There was no way I was going to make it out of this alive.

Color began to return to her skin. Her paper-white lips went rosy pink, and I felt an unmistakable squeeze against the palm of my hand. I was fading, fast, but not before she sat upright, a the ghost of a smile playing upon her lips.

She stared at me for a moment, slightly taken aback, searching my expression. She did a small double take.

"Ben?"

I grasped her hand, tightly, giving her a nod. Ben. How long I'd shied away from that name. It sounded like heaven, coming out of her mouth.

She smile, bringing her hand up to cradle my face. I watched as her gazes darted from my eyes to my lips. Before I could think twice about it, her lips were pressed up against mine.

I held her in close, pulling her hair into my hands, holding her tight. How long had I wanted this for? There had been women before, in the early days of the First Order, when I had just turned. I needed an outlet for my anger, and the women were wanting—but none like her. None that made me feel so alive, so seen.

No, Rey was the first woman I'd ever really loved.

If I were going to tell her, I knew that now would be my moment. "Rey," I breathed, "I don't know how much time we have…"

She crushed her lips down on to mine, deepening the kiss, opening her mouth. I knew I should tell her—I could feel the life force draining out of me into her. But it was almost as if she was volleying it back at me, with every kiss and every heavy breath she left against my lips.

"I know," she whispered, her mouth breaking away from mine. She held my gaze for a moment before lowering herself back down to the ground, this time pulling me on top of her. "But if this is all of the time we have left…"

She stopped herself short, wrapping her legs around my waist, bucking her hips against mine. Every time our bodies collided, it was as if another jolt of life force was shot back into my veins. I could tell that she knew this, too.

She traced my jawline, her hands running through my hair, my hands on her body—first cupping her face, her neck, until she impatiently moved them to her waist. "I want you, Ben," she breathed into my ear.

I kissed her neck before making my way down her body, trailing kisses from her ear to her collarbone, the valley between her breasts, her navel, before coming back up to plant more on her lips. I gazed into her eyes as she worked the fabric off of her body, pulling at the notches on my belt and the zipper of my pants.

"I love you, Rey," I said, just as she managed to work off the buckle of my belt. I dropped my pants down to my ankles, and her body was completely bare, save for a few wrappings around her chest.

"Ben," she managed, not able to contain a small smile as she said my name. She'd positioned herself so I was right at the edge of her entrance. I could feel her warmth radiating onto me. "I'm in love with you, Ben Solo."

I looked down, looking back up to meet her gaze one more time. "Are you sure?" I whispered.

She nodded, pulling me down for another kiss as I slid inside of her.

It was like nothing I'd ever felt before. All warmth and fire and feeling, just her body and mine, moving together as one. We clung to each other desperately, her nails digging into my back as I thrust into her. I cried out her name, unable to contain myself. I knew this would be our first and last time. Being inside of her was the only thing keeping me alive—her life Force and mine, meeting for one final time. A dyad in the Force meeting its end, and in the most intimate of ways at that.

Then again—we'd always been intimate. It was ironic, really, how close this felt to the first time we'd ever made contact through the Force. Even though I'd been physical with more women than I could count, our hands touching through the Force, all of those months ago, was the first time I'd ever known what real intimacy felt like. No, it wasn't so different, me thrusting in and out of her, slowly, deliberately, all the while trailing kisses down her neck as she started to pant my name. The only real difference was that this time there, was a chorus of _Ben, fuck, Ben,_ and, _Ben, that feels so good, _and finally, _I love you, Ben._

It was the first time I'd heard those words strung together, in that order. I looked at the cavern around us, the remnants of the Sith temple a reminder of where we were. I couldn't help but think, _this wasn't the way I would have wanted it to go_—not here. Not like this.

I would have wanted a room in a cabin somewhere, maybe Takodana or Naboo. I would have wanted to cook dinner together and unwind over a glass of wine before moving into the bedroom, carrying her across the threshold like a groom carrying his bride. I would have wanted to lie down on the sofa after, under a large blanket, watching as the fire danced in front of us, holding her close and interlacing our fingers.

And that wouldn't have been our last night. No, we would haveyears together, years of cooking dinner at home, years of dancing in Cantinas across the galaxy. Years of dueling with our sabers, for sport more than anything else, knowing we'd never find someone as evenly matched as one another. Years of "I love you's" and crying out each others' names in the throes of passion. Years of us holding each other close as well fell asleep, with nothing but the sound of our breathing and the fire cackling well into the night.

I gave one last thrust, and could feel tears start to stream down my face. I held her close, knowing the end was drawing near. I turned to look at her, to memorize the lines of her face. Forgetting for a moment that my mind was cracked open to hers.

"If all we have is one night on Exegol," Rey whispered, "I'll take it.

* * *

"_I think I might've inhaled you  
I could feel you behind my eyes  
You gotten into my bloodstream  
I could feel you floating in me…"_

~Bloodstream, Stateless

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**Author's Note:** TRoS done fucked me up, y'all.

I would highly recommend listening to "Bloodstream" by Stateless on loop as you read this. Let me know what you think in the reviews—it's been a minute since I last wrote smut, so any and all feedback is appreciated.


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